Not a Perfect Mom, But Who Cares?
In my pre-baby life I had it together.
I get to wake up a little late and still have all the time in the world to sip my morning coffee without rushing. I enjoyed my shower and still have time to put on some makeup and carefully choose clothes from my closet that would make me look somewhat stylish (to my taste). I had the luxury of time to ironed my clothes. I jogged, played badminton or sometime spent time away in a Starbucks cafe chatting with friends.
Then I became a mom. My priorities shifted. Suddenly none of these things mattered (which I am glad because I really don't have the time for those things anymore).
I eventually hit my stride as a mother and managed my new 'mom' life bringing on with me some of the important aspects from my former life. My everyday is now a never ending cycle that goes something like this:
1. Wake up (before anyone does)
2. Prepare breakfast, pack lunch, prepare my kid
3. Throw on whatever fits from my closet and pretend it’s an outfit
4. Work
5. Go home and prepare something for dinner
6. Bath time
7. Bedtime
8. Cook meals for tomorrow
9. Sleep (kind of)
10. Do it again
In all honesty, I have cried a million times over now more than ever, more than I'd like to admit.
There are moments when I feel so overwhelmed, frantic that I’m convinced I’m failing as a mother, a wife, an employee and I'm failing myself.
Then I have to remind myself that it's okay to feel like I don't have it all together. It's okay not to have it together. I am doing the best I can. That it's okay if some days I serve my kid instant noodles instead of a decent, home cooked meal. Or that I am leaving for work with our bed sheets unmade and turned over and our clean clothes strewn on the couch waiting to be fold. Or that I forgot to throw out the thrash in our washroom and it is overflowing. I can't do it all and that's okay. And who cares anyway?
But I've also realized that one important aspect from my former life that I fail to enjoy in my now is that while I feel that there's not an extra minute in the day to spare to do those mundane tasks, it's very important to find some alone time. I'm in a phase right now that when I do, I felt guilty when opting that something I think I should have done. But I realized that it may feel selfish to slip away for a massage, or a pedicure, or coffee with a friend but I need it to uncover my passion (like re-discovering my passion for writing). I need to take a break so in turn I have more of 'me' to give. A rested, relaxed and empowered me will be better able to remain focused and calm when my kid pushes buttons.
I'm still struggling to give it to myself though, but I am trying.
P.S.
I'm a big reader of other moms blogs. They're just so uplifting. I admit that some of my posts were inspired by them.
Women, we are connector. We engage each other heart to heart, regardless of the platform. When we connect, we form a bond; when we're together, we dream together and the outcome is so much larger than our individual dream.
Today, I wanna share this blog from another mom, this blog is one of those who inspired me to write again.
https://www.scarymommy.com/motherhood-mom-on-brink-breaking/
I get to wake up a little late and still have all the time in the world to sip my morning coffee without rushing. I enjoyed my shower and still have time to put on some makeup and carefully choose clothes from my closet that would make me look somewhat stylish (to my taste). I had the luxury of time to ironed my clothes. I jogged, played badminton or sometime spent time away in a Starbucks cafe chatting with friends.
Then I became a mom. My priorities shifted. Suddenly none of these things mattered (which I am glad because I really don't have the time for those things anymore).
I eventually hit my stride as a mother and managed my new 'mom' life bringing on with me some of the important aspects from my former life. My everyday is now a never ending cycle that goes something like this:
1. Wake up (before anyone does)
2. Prepare breakfast, pack lunch, prepare my kid
3. Throw on whatever fits from my closet and pretend it’s an outfit
4. Work
5. Go home and prepare something for dinner
6. Bath time
7. Bedtime
8. Cook meals for tomorrow
9. Sleep (kind of)
10. Do it again
In all honesty, I have cried a million times over now more than ever, more than I'd like to admit.
There are moments when I feel so overwhelmed, frantic that I’m convinced I’m failing as a mother, a wife, an employee and I'm failing myself.
Then I have to remind myself that it's okay to feel like I don't have it all together. It's okay not to have it together. I am doing the best I can. That it's okay if some days I serve my kid instant noodles instead of a decent, home cooked meal. Or that I am leaving for work with our bed sheets unmade and turned over and our clean clothes strewn on the couch waiting to be fold. Or that I forgot to throw out the thrash in our washroom and it is overflowing. I can't do it all and that's okay. And who cares anyway?
But I've also realized that one important aspect from my former life that I fail to enjoy in my now is that while I feel that there's not an extra minute in the day to spare to do those mundane tasks, it's very important to find some alone time. I'm in a phase right now that when I do, I felt guilty when opting that something I think I should have done. But I realized that it may feel selfish to slip away for a massage, or a pedicure, or coffee with a friend but I need it to uncover my passion (like re-discovering my passion for writing). I need to take a break so in turn I have more of 'me' to give. A rested, relaxed and empowered me will be better able to remain focused and calm when my kid pushes buttons.
I'm still struggling to give it to myself though, but I am trying.
P.S.
I'm a big reader of other moms blogs. They're just so uplifting. I admit that some of my posts were inspired by them.
Women, we are connector. We engage each other heart to heart, regardless of the platform. When we connect, we form a bond; when we're together, we dream together and the outcome is so much larger than our individual dream.
Today, I wanna share this blog from another mom, this blog is one of those who inspired me to write again.
https://www.scarymommy.com/motherhood-mom-on-brink-breaking/
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